26 October 2006

stand up.....stand up for what you believe in....I believe in GOD!

so it has been a wild week. and a week full of short sleep and crazy dreams. do you remember your dreams? i must say i am one of the lucky- or sometimes unlucky ones who remembers almost all my dreams. but this past week i have been having this same dream almosty every night. a little bit of it changes....but it is the same one.....and it sarts with this little cartoon sarting Veggies....HELP!
VeggieTales were first introduced to me when i started in full time youth ministry back in 1997 in walla walla, washington where they thought it would be fun to EVERY summer host Veggie Town VBS...don't get me wrong. the children of the church and commuinty loved it...but when you are part of the music team and told you get to dress as "larryboy" and lead singing well lets just say it was not my favorite moments of my day....but i will say i have always liked the videos....yes when i have had to watch the sameones over and over and over they got old...but i have always liked them all the same.....
so enter the story of Rack, Shack, and Benny....you know the real story right? hope so....if not...you know the King Neb? and the Golden idols he wanted everyone to bow down to? well this king had chocolate bunnies that everyone could eat and that you had to bow down to. well R,S,& B won't do it...so well into the fire they go...and you guess it they don't burn up....well enter my twisted brain...in my dream....i am all of a sudden in the veggie tale...yup ...me and all the animation...CRAZY....and it is me....my friend alex...and my friend vince...we are Rack, Shack, and Benny... but it isn't Bunnys we are asked to bow down to but this situation that i am dealing with right now.....and not a king but a pastor....CRAZY....so every night i am having this dream....and sometimes the friends change to other people....different friends...there to stand beside me to support me with what is happening....the strangest thing....is that who ever i am with we are all singing the CRAZY insane song that they sing in that show..in the Rack, Shack, and Benny episode..."stand up, stand up for what you believe in, believe in, I believe in God.....He's the one to back you up....." and on the song goes.....CRAZY.....
so here is my one wish....can i please have a NONVEGGIETALE night tonight? just one...it is starting to scare me.
so more on what happened later....just had to share the veggie tale crazy with ya
blessings and may you have a veggie tale dream tonight!
off to zzzzzzzzzland....

12 October 2006

be thou my vision and shooting stars

"Be thou my vision o Lord of my heart. Naught be all else to me save that thou art. Thou my best thought by day or by night, waking or sleeping thy presence, my light.
Be thou my wisdom and thou my true word I ever with thee and thou with me Lord; Thou my great Father and I Thy true Son, Thou in my dwelling and I with thee one.
Riches I need not, nor man's empty praise. Thou mine inheritance, now and always; Thou, and Thou only, first in my heart. High King of heaven, my treasure Thou art.
Be thou my vision o Lord of my heart. Naught be all else to me save that thou art. Thou my best thought by day or by night, waking or sleeping thy presence, my light.
High King of heaven, my victory won, may I reach heaven's joys, O bright heaven's Sun; Heart of my own heart, whatever befall, Still be my vision, O Ruler of all."

monday night as i was driving home from austin so tired....on the verge of getting sick i was blaring the cd of a friends band -brayline- (check them out www.brayline.com) that he gave me at the convention. he wanted to know what i thought of it while i was there. so i gave it a few good listens- and it is good....really it is....i didn't just tell him that because he is my friend....it is good...quality really! so anyway- i was fighting the want to sleep....so i pop it in...turn it up...and listen....not just okay i am listening to this guy sing...but i found myself really listening to the music...the words...the cd only had one original (and it is AMAZING) so they are songs i know...and usually being a person who LOVES to sing- especially worship music...the fact that i was just listening and not singing along---it was odd---especially since i was fighting sleep....anyway...so here i am driving down this winding road....bad winding road- crazy really. I keep seeing deer and such on the side of the road and i find myself praying to God that he will keep them on the side of the road and not infront of me. well on i drive...and i am on this back road and it is really really dark...no lights anywhere and be thou my vision starts and my heart starts to pound in my chest- its strange really. i keep getting this urgencey- this need to pull over....but i keep thinking no push on you HAVE TO GET HOME...you are almost there...but my heart feels like it is going to pound out of my chest...it almost hurts yet doesn't i am tell you it is the oddest feeling i have ever had in a car. i can't tell you how many times i have sang be thou my vision- i love it...it is a great hymn- but for some reason on that streach of road monday night it was brand new. i hit repeat on my cd player and the song starts again and at this point my heart breaks and i begin to weep...it was so overwhelming....yes truly at this point i should have pulled over--hindsight lizzy...but on i drove...i am not sure at what point i started singing but i did...at first i remember looking in my back seat thinking someone was in the car and then realizing it was my voice (okay promise i am not losing it) that i was hearing- but just didn't sound like me...can't explain it. then this strange peace....you see God has planted this vision on my heart...it has been there for a while- and i am both scared and excited.....nervous and elated.....fearful and joyful....spastic and calm.....i don't remember doing it but i must have hit repeat again because the song started again and i was just driving calmly and looking out...asking God to make clear the vision...to lead the way and to allow me to FEAR AND JUMP at the same time...many people have seen the vision and told me they get it and support it with me....but i know many won't and the ones i fear won't the most is my family....but even then i pray for strength to keep walking out to the edge to jump allowing the breeze of Jesus to catch me. so as a was driving and praying and Brayline was singing the words of the song out of this dark almost starless night came one flash......a falling star......a leap of faith? a jump into the fear of unknown? trusting Jesus to be the breeze to hold up the vision that was cast in his sails? i find myself more dizzy than normal right now....how to be all here when wanting to be all there....
one foot in front of the other.....
oh the journey of faith....i really want to talk to those who say it is dull.....they just don't get it do they ....hehehehe

be blessed...and look up....

08 October 2006

Austin NYWC and little sleep

so what is it about the nywc and lack of sleep...oh yes....friends....gotta love getting hooked up with your friends you haven't seen in a LONG time and just getting to chat. this is my favorite time of the year.....now if i could just find a way to stock pile sleep....grr hehehe okay on that note...off to zzz land....more tomorrow....right i always say that...but i am gonna really try this time.
off to dizzy dream land...